Click to start from the beginning Warning: This blog contains adult language and lots of drug references. A bunch. If you’re going through it or have been to hell and back this is for you.
Past drug abuse doesn’t mean your life is over and no, your brain isn’t broken…probably. My background and story begins with post 1 and I’m working on other posts as well.
Thank you and have a wonderful day!
6 Years Since My Last Drink
I recently passed this milestone and so I wanted to share. I’m going to start reorganizing this blog and writing some more soon. I’ve been very busy with life which has been excruciatingly stressful at times… worrying in ways that I had never known… but still not drinking. I now have a job that I’ve…
Drop Out, smoke crack, Get MBA: Wait, do kittens eat depression?
Thank you and welcome to my blog. This all started as random posts discussing my addictions. Please start with the first post and go in order if you can. I’ve really grown to like more music than I used to, but I still don’t like a lot of popular bands etc, that I actually hesitate…
Drop Out, smoke crack, Get MBA (part of story ….finally getting back to it)
Welcome to my blog. This started as fb posts about 5 years ago and then I started to hear from fellow addicts and started this blog. thank you and please start with the first post and go in order if you can. written over a few days, then posted without edit. Living this way is…
Function of Addiction / Great Quote I Heard
“When you make certain lifestyle choices…” Lifestyle choice… Choosing to live a certain lifestyle. It’s the choice part… the choosing part that I am beginning to see as highlighted and something that should be really thought about when you’re an addict or alcoholic. There are choices that are made and even little thoughts and voices…
becoming the one looking at me (not part of ongoing story… just a post)
I can remember hiding behind my mother as a child, around the age of three or so and not wanting to talk to the strange adult that was trying to coax me with baby talk. My mother would make up some excuse I’m sure so that I wouldn’t seem rude, but this basic scenario…
Cheesecake Monkey and Houston Ice (not part of series)
My addiction monkey found cheesecake… then he found out that there are amazing bakeries all over Houston that feature all kinds of cheesecake and other delicious things… cookies, tarts, holy fuck my addiction monkey went fucking crazy for a little while there. Calling my favorite spots… “What type of cheesecake do you have today?” oh….…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA…Four Years Without Alcohol
(written over several days weeks… short bursts of writing) (not part of ongoing series) Four years! I’ve made it without a drink for four years!!! I couldn’t make it past four hours, unless I was sleeping, before I finally decided that I had enough of that lifestyle. Now, I’m making it past yet another annual reminder. It feels…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA: San Diego post 2
That drive from Austin to San Diego was a really long drive. We were in a mid 80s Subaru wagon that had just had some work done to it and the mechanic promised us that it would make it, but we were still concerned. Going across Texas, seeing the hill country turn into the desert……
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA: San Diego post 1
This is part one of San Diego, but it all started in Austin. To go to the beginning click here I don’t really like change, but it was 2002 and I was just saying fuck it…I was going to move to San Diego and start a new life there. I had a friend who started…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA: Where are my jeans? Addicts coping with loss…(random post, not part of series)
to read the ongoing series click here I still can’t find my jeans. These aren’t cheap jeans either, not that you can find cheap ones anymore, but these are above $100 a pair, jeans. I was nervously trying to find them, worrying about it, going through all my stuff with the subtilty of a COPS…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA…(random post, not part of series)
Someone very close to me has recently been given a terminal diagnosis in regard to cancer and I’ve written a few posts, just trying to deal with this situation and without the crutch of alcohol. Ugh… someone close to me that loves life is preparing to die… it makes me think of my own depression…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA (random Post)
(This is a random post, not part of the ongoing series) Water Damage? Who the fuck rips off a terminally ill cancer patient that is beaming with excitement while enthusiastically describing her need for a good used RV… so that she can travel back and forth between California, Texas, and Tennessee, while stopping for chemo…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA (random post, not part of the ongoing series)
I’ve been neglecting writing lately, but as far as self-inflicted neglect and my life goes…the act of neglecting my writing seems rather minor… just brings a little cognitive dissonance, no biggie smalls. I’m working in a position that seems way below my education and experience level in just about every regard right now, but I…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA (random short post)
(This isn’t part of the ongoing series) I haven’t written in a bit, I’ve been busy…but I’m still alcohol free after all these years… coming up on four here pretty soon…just a few months. I’m also coming up on my cigarette anniversary… 11 or 12 years maybe on that one. It’s funny how it just…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 20, part 1 (Austin)
This is part of an ongoing series. Please start from the beginning which is post 1 by clicking here. Now, if we go back 20 years or so, I remember getting up to the hotel room, I guess it was a hotel room. It had that industrial carpet that is common in the “recently remolded”…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 19, part 1 (Austin)
This is part of an ongoing series. Please start with the first post by clicking here! Holy shit. That was on our answering machine. I made it. I was going on the road. As the days that remain until I graduate slowly pass and as I write this blog I sometimes just stop and wonder…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA (random weekend post)
This is just a random weekend post… not part of the ongoing series… to go there just click here. My biggest enemy is my own mind… my own insecurities, and I’ve improved a lot in the past decade. I really have. My 40s were all about improvement. My biggest friend is my own mind as…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA, post 18, part 1 (Austin)
This is part of an ongoing series… it is suggested that you start with the first post by clicking here. This is actually an older post from my blog that was deleted a while back. I’m trying to let the past blog posts catch up to the current day. We’ll see… I posted to reddit…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 17, part 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series, it is suggested that you start with post 1. This post is from my older blog, which is catching up to todays date eventually. haha Three more classes. That’s it. My project team is currently working on the BSG-online business simulation as part of our MBA capstone project. It’s…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA Post 16, Part 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series and it is suggested that you start from the beginning. To do so just click here. These are older posts that will eventually catch up to the current date. I’m about 4 weeks away from earning my Master’s in Business Administration. Wow. This has taken so much work over…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA, Weekend Post: Facebook Addiction (not part of the ongoing series)
I’m all about self-improvement… giving up crack, cocaine, pills, cigarettes, alcohol, earning an associate degree, bachelor of science, graduate certificate, and a masters degree, not too bad for an addict / alcoholic… and now I’m just trying to keep that continuous improvement, Toyota-type philosophy of life going in the positive direction. I’ve been trying to…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 15, part 1 (Austin)
Part of a series…please click here to start from the beginning Taking shrooms and going to 6th Street on Halloween had always seemed like a cool idea, but I was usually working. I did however go one year, and it was such a fucking trip. Thousands upon thousands of costumed, drunken revelers turning in this circle,…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA… I would have been the hated parent in the story told (not part of the series)
I’ve never had children… during the years of life when that generally takes place I was performing on small dive bar type of comedy club stages, usually located in a small bar or restaurant that built a stage in order to provide entertainment… karaoke one night, comedy, trivia, when the bar-back gets married it’s a…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 14, pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series… click here to start from the beginning No, you’re out of order! I’m not sure how I skipped over it, but I did a perform comedy one night at Maggie Mae’s on 6thStreet. I don’t think that I’ve mentioned this yet and honestly there’s no way for me to…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 13 pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series. It is suggested that you start with the first post, post 1 “Hey, do you think that they would get mad if I wore the milk jug costume?” “Do you care if they get mad?” “Good Point” I look back at my days in Austin frequently, reminiscing in my…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 12, pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series…it is suggested that you start with post 1 I didn’t smoke any crack in the house while I was living with the dancer. And as I’ve said, I wasn’t even close to having sex with her, and that was just fine with me at the time. Sometimes you know…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA… Did Hard Drug Use Help Me Cognitively?
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA (not part of the ongoing series) to read the ongoing series click here I’ve made it through graduate level classes like statistics, accounting, finance, and too many math based…quantitative classes to mention here but my brain didn’t used to work that way. While earning my bs in psychology I…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 11, pt. 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series…it is suggested that you start with post 1 I always had a small notebook in my back pocket in order to write down jokes, but then I also began to write down things that weren’t jokes necessarily, but just my feelings in general. I would keep that notebook with…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 10, pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series… it is suggested that you click here to start from the first post You know that movie Friday? The one with Ice Cube, Chris Tucker? Almost everybody that I’ve ever met loves that movie. “Oh, it’s hilarious.” They will say. To be honest though, I don’t really care for…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 9, pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series… please go to post 1 to start from the beginning I earned my MBA in August 2018, but I didn’t walk for graduation. I can’t. Oh, they would let me, it’s nothing like that. I just couldn’t. My anxiety sometimes keeps me from participating in activities like that. I…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 8, pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series. Please start with post 1 in order to start from the beginning John said no. Thank God John said no. If John would have said yes…holy shit man, there is very little chance that I would be here. John would occasionally smoke weed, but he never did coke. He…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 7, pt 1 (Austin)
This is part of a series…please start with the first post I knew what a speedball was, but that was as far as my speedball experience went. I hate needles. I can understand the “uh, huh.” That I may be getting from you but it’s true. I really hate needles. I used to get extremely…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 6, pt 1 (Austin)
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 6, part 1 (Austin) (These are all part of a series…it is suggested that you start with post 1) That first binge at Jason’s was really fun and his blow was getting better with every line that I did, plus Jason said that he always had coke around and…
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 5, pt 1 (Austin)
Do I have to explain to you what a weed bullet pipe is? I think that they still sell them. It’s small, metal, the top screw off, there is a rubber mouthpiece, and you can hit it for a long time if packed well.
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA post 4, pt 1 (Austin)
“Don’t ever let your supplier meet your buyer. I was so excited to have my 8 balls but let me just tell you how fucking stupid I was. Alright, when you want to set up shop at any level there are going to be some costs involved.”
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA Post 3, Pt. 1 (Austin)
“Hello, Crack-Head, Real Estate, Car Rental. This is Steven speaking. Yes, we have that late model 300z in. No, I don’t own it, but yes you can rent it out for some coke.”
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA Post 2, Pt 1 (Austin)
Mike would drive around UT and The Drag with a safe in his trunk filled with coke.
Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA, Post 1, Pt 1 (Austin)
When I started pre-school as a kid it wasn’t long before I knew something was different and wrong with me. I was broken.
I’ve been an alcoholic, a coke head, crack head, druggie, and comic working at The Comedy Store for several years. After that I was a research assistant, made the Dean’s List, and earned an associate degree (2013), a B.S. in Psychology (2015), and an MBA (2018).
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Drop Out, Smoke Crack, Get MBA 